100 Ways of Knowing Your a Comp. Sci When....
- Attendees
- meter@bmerhbfc
- Colin Kemp 7K76 BNR
- Author
- Colin Kemp 7K76 BNR
- Summary
For your information:
---forwarded-message---->
Jul 26 10:10:00 1995
To: John (J.A.) Posavad (BNR) Dept 7X85 SKY
Stephan (S.) Radatus (BNR) Dept 7Q33 SKY
Kevin (K.D.) MacGregor (BNR) Dept 7AB1 CAR
Vivienne (V.G.) Suen (BNR) Dept 7K54 SKY
Jennifer (J.S.) Barnes (BNR) Dept 9E44 CAR
Dan (D.) Caputo (BNR) Dept 7I64 SKY
Nicole (N.A.) Cairns (BNR) Dept 1R23 SKY
Jane (J.) Dowsey (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
Edward (E.) Hindle (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
William (W.J.) Myette (BNR) Dept 2H46 SKY
John (J.) Oliveira (BNR) Dept 7L15 SKY
Jeffrey (J.S.) Sugimoto (BNR) Dept 9E12 CAR
Jeremy (J.) Storer (BNR) Dept 7K24 SKY
Jennifer (J.L.) Bell (BNR) Dept 7K44 SKY
Grant (G.) Olecko (BNR) Dept P963 CRK
Greg (G.) Armstrong (BNR) Dept 7B96 CAR
Rodrigo (R.) Geve (BNR) Dept 1B12 SKY
'[email protected]' (INTERNET)
'[email protected]' (INTERNET)
Copy to: Kevin (K.D.) Carlyle (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
Patricia (P.Z.C.) Du (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
Patricia (P.A.) Dy (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
Sandra (S.) Fabiano (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
Colin (C.A.) Hart (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
Colin (C.W.) Kemp (BNR) Dept 7X85 SKY
From: Kevin (K.C.) Lee (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
Subject: 100 Ways of Knowing Your a Comp. Sci When....
Hi all. I usually don't mail out large lists such as this one, but I thought
this might make your day a little brighter, since it is Water World outside.
I know that half of you are engineers, so we'll all understand if you don't get
them all :)
For those from Western in the past year or so, this was forwarded to me by our
very own Jeffro McRae, the bum doing an IBM internship instead of working here.
What a bonehead! :)
Kevin
___________________________________________________________________________
100 Ways of Knowing Your a Comp. Sci When....
by: Todd Burgess ([email protected])
_____________Copyright 1995________________________________________________
Feel Free To Distribute this list to all Your Friends
Computer Science Forever!
1) Asked about your religion you reply "Unix"
2) You are your own nameserver
3) You know what a nameserver is
4) You think knowing C means your bi-lingual
5) You regard emacs users as the enemy
6) You regard vi users as your friend
7) You regard everybody else as DOS users.
8) You have installed Linux at least three times
9) You load Doom so you can play DOS
10) You write your homepage using vi and not some wimpy HTML converter
11) You can translate this sentence.
12) The number of times you've used Windows 3.11 you can count on one hand
13) You wish your brain had its own IP address
14) You know at leat 30 ftp sites off the top of your head
15) You think working at Microsoft is degrading
16) You've hit the power switch on a Mac to eject a disk
17) When asked about Macs you reply "Sorry I don't play with toys"
18) You follow software version numbers the way people do baseball stats
19) You check your mail at least 10 times daily
20) You subscribe to mailing lists just to fill your mailbox
21) Nobody sends you e-mail
22) You've fake mailed somebody
23) You know what ports 7,23,25,79 and 80 mean
24) You do all your assignments the night before
25) Your still trying to discover what that Formal Logic and Discrete Math
course was good for
26) People walk up to you and say "You always seem to be logged in"
27) You've hacked somebody's account
28) You have made "free" phone calls
29) You know root's password on some system
30) You know root's password on some system that isn't your own
30) You log in as root and proceed to go through your own home directory
deleting files for a power trip
32) You log in as yourself and proceed to go through other people's home
directorys for a power trip
33) You have told a freind "Gee, the security on this system sucks. Here
let me show you"
34) Your high school comp. sci. teacher was an idiot
35) You've lectured a computer teacher, pointing out all the mistakes
they made in their lesson
36) You've done this in front of the class
37) All computing activity must take place within easy reach of caffeine
38) You have drank beer and programmed at the same time
39) You've written better code while under the influence of alcohol
40) You have told a Microsoft joke.
41) You worry that if you drop out now you'll become another Bill Gates
42) Your comp. sci. TA gives you low marks because they are jealous of
your superior programming abilities
43) You have downloaded dirty JPGs before you were 18
44) You remember unix passwords but not your bank card PIN numbers
45) You can pick out a computer conversion a mile away
46) You have beaten somebody up for saying "information superhighway"
47) You put somebody's surfboard where the sun don't shine for saying
"Surf the net"
48) You picked comp. sci to meet women
49) You never date
50) Your last girlfriend was on a CD-ROM
51) You have more then 5 unix accounts
52) You post all your unix accounts in your .sig file
53) Your homepage contains the phrase "this Web page is still under
construction"
54) You drool over computer specs
55) You drool over yourself
56) You've worn your clothes more then once without washing them
57) You never wash your clothes
58) You wear glasses or should be wearing glasses
59) You have told an engineer joke
60) You think engineers are a joke
61) You cringe when an engineer uses a computer
62) Nobody uses your computer except for yourself
63) People have died for using your computer without your permission
64) You've done hardware repair over the phone
65) You've introduced yourself using your e-mail address
66) You broke out laughing in Jurassic Park when the girl said, "Hey this
is unix. I know unix"
67) You associate GUIs with computer illiteracy
68) You associate Microsoft with computer illiteracy
69) Your mouse collects dust
70) You can count in base 2 : 2,4,8,16,32,64,128,256,512,1024,2048,4096,8192
71) Your hard drive is all neatly organized but everything around your
computer is a mess
72) There are at least 6 empty Pepsi cans surrounding your computer
73) You haven't seen sunlight in the last 72 hours
74) You think Star Trek is real
75) You can't do math
76) Everybody thinks you are weird
77) Everybody else is weird and your normal
78) You have collected at least 200 computer viruses
79) You wrote 50 of your viruses
80) Root has sent you mail asking what were you doing
81) Sys. Admins snoop your tty sessions "just in case"
82) You snoop your sys. admin's tty sessions "just in case"
83) You wrote your resume in PostScript.
84) You ftp'ed all your Linux disks
85) You only read the manual after you have screwed something up
86) You never comment your code
87) Your user documentation is just a print out of the source code
88) You are thought of as a god when the computer goes down
89) You send mail to people using mail
90) You know Microsoft is the biggest threat to democracy since communism
91) You watch idiot's guide to computers television shows just to pick out
all the mistakes and to realize how smart you are
92) People engage in conversations with you just to realize how dumb they are
93) You have turned an English essay into a computer science project
94) You always make sure you have an ASCII table handy
95) You don't know what the word "backup" means
96) You have a fond affection for Digital VT100 terminals
97) Your still a virgin
98) You never brush your teeth
99) You haven't figured out how to program a VCR
and finally
100) You would rather step in sh*t at Reynolds then sleep with it at
Thornbrough.
(for all non-University of Guelph comp. sci's it means "You'd rather be a
comp. sci then an engineer)