Shotgun
- Attendees
- meter@bmerhbfc
- Colin Kemp 7K76 BNR
- Author
- Colin Kemp 7K76 BNR
- Summary
For your information:
---forwarded-message---->
Jun 17 09:11:00 1996
To: Cameron (C.W.) Turner (BNR) Dept 7K76 SKY
Victor (V.) Pak (BNR) Dept 7K35 SKY
Colin (C.W.) Kemp (BNR) Dept 7K76 SKY
Patricia (P.A.) Dy (BNR) Dept 7I61 SKY
From: Daniel (D.A.) Reynolds (BNR) Dept 5E11 CAR
Subject: fw:Shotgun
Attachment: 1) UNIX File: ORIGINAL.HEADER - 2400 bytes
<< start of forwarded material >>
>> The Shotgun Constitution
>> -by Brian Gerk
>>
>> Terminology:
>> Shotgun -The rightmost front passenger seat in a vehicle, a prime
>> choice for any passenger, since it is the most comfortable seat, and also
>> because of the psychological advantage of not being forced to
>> subserviently look at the back of another person's head during a trip.
>> Enthronement-The physical presence of a person in the Shotgun
>> position.
>>
>> By Laws:
>> Vehicle Ownership
>> The owner of a vehicle, if he/she isn?t driving, always gets Shotgun in
>> that vehicle. It is their car, it is their seat and they get it. This is a
>> real
>> bonus for an owner who is falling down drunk. They can rest assured
>> Shotgun is rightfully theirs. They won?t have to worry about
>> concentrating through an alcohol-induced haze simply to remember to
>> call Shotgun in their own hard-earned car. Once proper Shotgun
>> ?enthronement? rights have been established, they may also be
>> surrendered. If the owner of the vehicle is eligible for Shotgun, but
>> wants to sleep it off in the back seat, then they may give up Shotgun to a
>> person of their choice. The vehicle owner is also the ultimate judge in
>> any Shotgun disputes. Their word is law, and all passengers must defer
>> to the owner?s interpretation of Shotgun law. Arbitration should be swift
>> and final, so that everyone can be on their way. If the owner is going to
>> stray from the Shotgun Constitution, they must have a good reason for
>> doing so. If the owner is not eligible for Shotgun, any passenger can call
>> Shotgun, but only under the proper conditions
>>
>> Legal Conditions for Calling Shotgun
>> Shotgun can only be called when the driver is enroute to the vehicle for
>> the purpose of driving immediately, and the Shotgun position is vacant.
>> Shotgun cannot be called upon arrival, only upon departure. For example,
>> a group of travelers may arrive at a restaurant and get out of the car for
>> a meal. Some bone-head might try calling Shotgun immediately for the
>> subsequent ride home, but that is not appropriate. If this kind of
>> precedent were allowed, it would let anyone call Shotgun ?futures? for
>> potential rides into eternity. Only after finishing the meal, when the
>> driver
>> picks up the car keys, is a Shotgun call allowed. Jingling keys is a very
>> strong sign of an Enroute condition. If the driver says ?lets go? that also
>> can be reasonably construed as Enroute. Most Enroute conditions mean
>> that driving will take place within a few minutes, but not always. If the
>> driver of a car turns around on a three hour trail ride, and says ?lets go
>> home,? then an enroute condition exists and Shotgun may be called
>> immediately.
>>
>> Forcible Dethronement (a.k.a. Physical Challenge)
>> There are some people in this world that always remember to call
>> Shotgun. Although this is an admirable trait at first, it quickly grows old.
>> These people tend to be real weenies, and if they knew better, would
>> sometimes let someone else call shotgun just to be a little more
>> diplomatic.The purpose of the Shotgun Constitution is to provide for a
>> peaceful, fair method of getting to ride Shotgun. Unfortunately, if an
>> introverted nerd consistently calls Shotgun ad nauseum, there must be
>> accommodations for that person to be forcibly removed from the seat.
>> Thus the Forcible Dethronement policy. This allows one other passenger
>> (usually larger in stature) to declare ?Physical Challenge!? and pull, push
>> or otherwise eject the previous Shotgun participant from the seat.
>> Although frowned upon if used regularly, this physical challenge is a
>> legitimate means of wresting Shotgun control away from the legal party.
>> Any physical tactics short of grievous bodily injury are employable.
>>
>> The Dick Clause
>> Though not a formal by-law of the Constitution, the Dick Clause is a
>> necessary refinement in semantics.Just because the driver?s girlfriend,
>> boyfriend, wife, whoever happens to be in the car, that Significant Other
>> does not get Shotgun by default. Anyone else can legally call Shotgun
>> and force the Significant Other to ride in the back.But then of course that
>> would mean that person is a Dick.
>>
>> Post-amble
>> I first drafted the Shotgun Constitution in 1990 while attending
>> Embry-Riddle University in Florida. The Constitution was widely
>> distributed via fax, and steered many young passengers towards a more
>> democratic form of ridership. It is time to resurrect this living document,
>> and to let a new generation of passengers rightfully call SHOTGUN.
>>
>> If there is any new case law I should be aware of for the Shotgun
>> Constitution, please e-mail me at: [email protected]. I will conduct a judicial
>> review of your case and see whether it merits an amendment to the
>> Constitution.
>
<< end of forwarded material >>
Dan
-------------------------------------
Dan Reynolds
x37584
Network Controller and Communications
-------------------------------------
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Date: Sun, 16 Jun 1996 22:06:31 -0700
To: Dan Reynolds , Jeff Patterson ,
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From: Erin Dalzell
Subject: Shotgun
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